It’s Fun To Stay At The C-O-R-D-O-B-A

Greg Gutfeld:

So, the Muslim investors championing the construction of the new mosque near Ground Zero claim it’s all about strengthening the relationship between the Muslim and non-Muslim world.

As an American, I believe they have every right to build the mosque – after all, if they buy the land and they follow the law – who can stop them?

Which is, why, in the spirit of outreach, I’ve decided to do the same thing.

I’m announcing tonight, that I am planning to build and open the first gay bar that caters not only to the west, but also Islamic gay men. To best express my sincere desire for dialogue, the bar will be situated next to the mosque Park51, in an available commercial space.

This is not a joke. I’ve already spoken to a number of investors, who have pledged their support in this bipartisan bid for understanding and tolerance.

As you know, the Muslim faith doesn’t look kindly upon homosexuality, which is why I’m building this bar. It is an effort to break down barriers and reduce deadly homophobia in the Islamic world.

The goal, however, is not simply to open a typical gay bar, but one friendly to men of Islamic faith. An entire floor, for example, will feature non-alcoholic drinks, since booze is forbidden by the faith. The bar will be open all day and night, to accommodate men who would rather keep their sexuality under wraps – but still want to dance.

Bottom line: I hope that the mosque owners will be as open to the bar, as I am to the new mosque. After all, the belief driving them to open up their center near Ground Zero, is no different than mine.

My place, however, will have better music.

Andrew Sullivan:

Fox News’ Mr Gutfeld proposes building a gay bar right next to the Cordoba Initiative complex in downtown Manhattan. Fantastic idea. That’s exactly the right response to an expression of religious freedom: the expression of freedom for gay people as well. In fact, it’s such a great idea that it could be followed across the country: gay bars right next to churches and mosques that condemn homosexuality. Wait, there’s more:

The goal, however, is not simply to open a typical gay bar, but one friendly to men of Islamic faith. An entire floor, for example, will feature non-alcoholic drinks, since booze is forbidden by the faith. The bar will be open all day and night, to accommodate men who would rather keep their sexuality under wraps – but still want to dance.

Bottom line: I hope that the mosque owners will be as open to the bar, as I am to the new mosque. After all, the belief driving them to open up their center near Ground Zero, is no different than mine. My place, however, will have better music.

I suspect it will be a huge hit not just with Muslim gay men but with the bears (who doesn’t like a bushy beard on a hot Middle Eastern dude?) and the Recovery community. A gay bar with an alcohol-free zone. Greg is ahead of his time.

Megan McArdle:

This is kind of a jerk move.  But it’s a brilliant jerk move.  I am hoping that at least one person will attempt to explain why we should support the mosque near Ground Zero, but not the gay bar next to the mosque near Ground Zero.  I would find that very entertaining.

(I support both, with the caveat that I’m not really sure that there’s a shortage of deliberate provocations in today’s America.  And I’m pretty sure that there’s not a shortage of deliberate provocations from political broadcast personalities.  But he’s certainly got a right to do it.)

I’ll be surprised, however, if he manages to get a liquor license from Bloomberg’s government.

Jeffrey Goldberg:

Megan asks whether the Bloomberg Administration would support a liquor license for the gay bar Greg Gutfeld suggests should be built next to the so-called Ground Zero mosque. I don’t see why Bloomberg would oppose the license. Now if the bar was to peddle trans-fats to gay Muslims, that’s another story. And excessively-salty foods. (No too-obvious jokes, please.)

Andrew, by the way, is holding a contest to name Gutfeld’s bar. Send him your entries.
My suggestions: “The Queen Boat.” (You can look it up.) Or, better yet, “Kandahar.” Those who have been there will know what I’m talking about.

And of course, Twitter is getting into the swing of things by naming Greg’s gay bar. Here are some ideas:

Al Gayda — Chuck_Dizzle

The Velvet Sword, Jihard and/or Dome of the Cock — AceofSpades

United 69 — Iowahawkblog

Ba’ath House — DuchessRebecca

You get the idea. Conservatives are creative so this should be successful.

Not an idea that would play well with Christians or Jews vis-a-vis property adjacent to a church or temple, but oh well: If we’re going to celebrate tolerance regardless of the sensitivities of the surrounding area, let’s celebrate! And the best part? Because, as we’ve been assured many times, the “Park51″ cultural center will be a model of moderation, gay Muslim men don’t have to worry about being seen entering Gut’s establishment. Flaunt it all you want, fellas; you’re in Moderate Town, U.S.A., on that block. I look forward to the congratulatory Mike Bloomberg press conference.

Ann Althouse:

What’s next in the series that begins Ground Zero, mosque, gay bar…? Help me compose the multiple choice question options. When you’ve done that and identified the correct answer, compose a multiple choice question based on the new series of items. Continue in this fashion until you’re ready to write an essay on why you think this conversation in the form of retaliatory expressive architecture has to end and how you propose to end it.

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1 Comment

Filed under Religion

One response to “It’s Fun To Stay At The C-O-R-D-O-B-A

  1. M.S. Haden

    Splendid idea, sort of the alpha and omega of socialization – however, if it’s located to the west of the Mosque, the Muslims would likely forego the sidewalk, bend-over, evening prayers…

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